Episode 198

#198 | The Parenting Shift That Builds Trust With Your LGBTQ+ Child (Instead of Breaking It)

Do you ever feel like the harder you try to guide your LGBTQ+ child, the more they pull away?

You’re not alone. In this deeply personal episode, Heather Hester explores the emotional weight of control, how it shows up in families, and why learning to lead with influence, not force, can transform your relationship with your child. Whether you’re parenting a queer or trans teen or simply navigating a tense family dynamic, this episode offers a compassionate reframe grounded in real-life stories and tools.

  • Understand why control breeds resistance and how influence fosters lasting trust
  • Learn how to recognize control patterns in your parenting and gently shift your approach
  • Discover Heather’s ARCC method for setting loving boundaries with courage and clarity

Press play to begin releasing control and embracing the kind of influence that builds deeper bonds with your LGBTQ+ child and with yourself.

Resource Spotlight

  • Brené Brown’s Daring Greatly — A powerful book about vulnerability, trust, and courage. It’s a reminder that letting go of control is often where the real strength lies.
  • Greater Good Science Center (UC Berkeley) — Research-backed resources on how compassion and influence, not control, create healthier relationships and communities.
  • The Gottman Institute — Relationship experts offering tools to replace control with influence and build trust in families, partnerships, and beyond.

Hi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!

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At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.

If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.

Whether you’re listening in, working with me directly, or quietly taking it all in—I see you. And I’m so glad you’re part of this journey.

More Human. More Kind. formerly Just Breathe: Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen explores connection, courage, and community for every concerned parent, mom, or ally navigating fear, grief, and bigotry with hope, resilience, and empathy. Through open-minded education, inclusive parenting guidance, and advocacy for mental health, safety, and a human first approach, we support LGBTQ youth and stand for human rights and social justice. More Human. More Kind. empowers listeners to shift their mindset, embrace activism and allyship, and lead with kindness, healing, and purpose.



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About the Podcast

Show artwork for More Human More Kind: Guidance for Parenting LGBTQ+ Teens & Growing Into a Courageous Ally
More Human More Kind: Guidance for Parenting LGBTQ+ Teens & Growing Into a Courageous Ally
Parenting and Ally Skills to Advocate for Your LGBTQ+ Teen with Love and Confidence

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About your host

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Heather Hester

She’s a butterfly in motion—transforming spaces, stories, and hearts. Heather Hester is a rare blend of fierce advocate and gentle guide, using her voice to build bridges across divides. As the host of *More Human. More Kind.*, author of *Parenting with Pride*, and founder of Chrysalis Mama, Heather doesn’t just speak about love, allyship, and authenticity—she *embodies* them.

Her superpower? Turning complex, messy truths into clear, compassionate conversations that leave you feeling empowered, curious, and just a little more human. From Substack to podcast, workshop to stage, she creates spaces where healing is possible, voices are heard, and no one stands alone.

Whether she’s amplifying marginalized stories, coaching parents through life’s pivots, or unpacking the First Amendment with a side of soul, Heather leads with purpose and heart. She’s not here for surface-level support—she’s here to change how we show up for each other.

Married to the funniest guy she’s ever known and mom to four extraordinary kids (two of whom are LGBTQ) and one sassy mini Bernedoodle, Heather is all about showing up with humor, humility, and heart. You can almost always find her with a cup of coffee in hand—at her computer, on her yoga mat, or dancing in the kitchen to her favorite playlist. She believes in being fully human, embracing the messiness, and helping others do the same.